Category Archives: From My Heart

“Like a Machine”… He said

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Image of Holding HandsI take a somewhat unusual approach to dealing with the subject of the sex education with my children.  Yehovah told the Hebrew people that they were to read the entire Torah to the entire assembly – men, women & children, every 7 years.  What that means is by the time a child was 7 he would have heard the Torah at least once.  Given the rather graphic stories in Torah, and those instructions, I have to assume that Yehovah thought a child at age 7 was old enough to hear about the “birds & the bees” and a whole lot else!  My intent is not to teach them “thou shalt nots”  as a set of arbitrary rules, but to teach the reason why it’s a good idea to take a bath, eat clean meats, wait for the unity Yehovah has in mind for marriage before having sex.  I want them to see the heart of Yehovah full of love for his children.

So, we read the Torah together, following the Torah portion schedule.  We also read the NT, and from the rest of the OT, but, it’s usually the Torah portion that gets the most natural and appropriate questions.  Today, was Leviticus 15, which deals with cleanliness issues due to discharge – from a running nose, to seminal fluid, to menstruation.  It makes sense really – if you are puking, snotting all over the place, have blood oozing out of a sore – you don’t need to be going to the tabernacle to worship and fellowship.  Stay at home, take daily baths, get better.  Pretty common sense stuff really!

If you’re a man, and you ejaculate, and it’s on your sheets – wash yourself, you sheets and go to fellowship after you’ve bathed.   Also, lots of sense being made there!  I’ve already talked about Niddah in earlier posts, which you can follow the links to, so won’t reiterate here… Altho, I will say, we had a beautiful conversation about how Yehovah designed women, and what a special time Niddah is, and how they as men can respect and love the women in their lives thru it  (in a way that includes proper touch).

Point being – today, this turned to conversation about sex.  In fact, my oldest, as we were talking about Niddah, goes, “Oh, so if a husband and wife want to have a baby, then they need to have sex in the time before the Niddah, and a little while after, so there is a good layer of blood to take care of the baby with!” Yep, you got it kiddo!  🙂

But then he had a serious question, which I answered, about what is appropriate to talk about in public, and we discussed puberty (he’s almost 11), and wet dreams, and that none of these emissions we were reading about are “sin” – it’s just a matter of you need to take a shower afterwards, and wash your sheets regularly  🙂 .
Next we got to talking about how premarital sex can be painful – for the heart.  We were talking about unity in all things – heart, mind, soul and that Bodily Unity of intercourse is the final step.
He said, “Yeah, it’s like the key that locks it all in place.”
“Sorta” I replied, using interlocking fingers to demonstrate, “Once  there is unity in everything else, then yes, it locks everything and seals the union of husband and wife.”

I continued, “And,  if you have sex, before the other things are united, think about how that wouldn’t work!”  as I linked my two pinky fingers together as the locked key, and then tried to push my otherwise closed fist together.

Light dawning, “Yeah…. Like a machine that’s missing gear pieces… clunk dunk bing bang chunk” 

Image of Broken gears from www.ericgarland.co

Yep.  Like that.  I think he’s got it.

 

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As a side note, because my almost 6 year old was needing to understand the terms semen, sperm, etc we also got out the beautiful book “From Conception to Birth” and looked at the pictures.  What a fun time, of them laughing about how the embryo looks like an alien to “Oh, He’s so cute!”  –  a perfectly forming little human, only 1/2  inch long.

 “Can you believe it?  Something so tiny, with a beating heart, and so cute and forming into a baby.  Now you  understand why it’s so important to take care of Momma, cause she has precious cargo held in her womb!”  

The look on the eldest’s face told me he got that too!

Image of 56 day Embryo  (taken by Bradley Scott)

 

Eye Contact

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Image of

” I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye.”  Ps 32:8

Image of Dog heeling, looking up at Master

Eyes on the Master

I remember instructing and teaching my dog to heel.  When a  dog is trained to heel properly, he is not to walk ahead of the Master, but is to hang back, just enough to see the Master’s leg…  just enough to see the actions of the Master, to turn when the Master turns.  The dog is guided by his eye, on the Master’s movement…

But, what does it mean to be guided with Yehovah’s eye?  Does that not mean we must be looking at least at His Eyes, if not gazing deeply into them?  What is it, to be guided with Yehovah’s eye?  What is it to be so intimately connected to Yehovah that we can see His direction for us reflected in His Eyes? What is it to make Eye Contact with the Creator, with the King of the Universe, the Prince of Peace, the Lover of our Souls??

Yehovah… Please Guide me with Thine Eyes!!!

Image of Lover's maintaining Eye Contact

Sukkot Lulav Craft

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A Lulav includes the Four Species that Scripture mentions as part of the Sukkot celebrations.
From Wikipedia:
The four species (Hebrew: ארבעת המינים‎ arba’at ha-minim, also called arba minim) are four plants mentioned in theTorah (Leviticus 23:40) as being relevant to Sukkot.[1] Karaite Jews build their Sukkot out of branches from the four specified plants (see Other interpretations), while Rabbinic Jews take three types of branches and one type of fruit which are held together and waved in a special ceremony during the Jewish holiday of Sukkot. The waving of the four plants is a mitzvah prescribed by the Torah, and contains symbolic allusions to a Jew’s service of God.

The mitzvah of waving the Four Species derives from the Torah. In Leviticus, it states:

Leviticus 23:40 And you shall take on the first day the fruit of splendid trees, branches of palm trees and boughs of leafy trees and willows of the brook, and you shall rejoice before the LORD your God for seven days. English Standard Version

In Leviticus 23:40 the Hebrew terms for the four plants are:

  • ets hadar (עֵץ הָדָר) magnificent trees
  • tamar (תְּמָרִים) palm trees
  • ets avoth (עֵץ־עָבֹת) thick trees
  • arvei nachal (עַרְבֵי נַחַל) willows of the brook

In Talmudic tradition, the four plants are identified as:

This year, Father gave me the idea to create a Lulav with only paper, scissors or a straight edge, and a pen.
What follows are the instructions for making it yourself.  I took photos on my first time making it, so there are some minor improvements from the photos.  🙂

Sukkot Lulav Construction paper Craft for children, and those young at heart!

Needed:  8 sheets of Construction paper –  2 dark green, 2 light green, 1 tan/brown or beige, 1 yellow, 2 light blue
Scissors; a Pen, pencil or Markers
The finished product should look like this (except with a yellow Citron, not from plain white paper)
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1. Take each sheet of paper, and draw lines as you see them on the following photos, this will be enough to make 4 lulav’s  The dark green sheets are for Open Palm, and should match one another. The two light green sheets are for the willow and the myrtle and also should match one another:

Dark Green – Two sheets – for Open Palm:
Open Palm

Light Green, 2 sheets – Willow & Myrtle

Willow & Myrtle

Willow & Myrtle

Light Blue – 2 sheets – Closed Palm

Closed Palm

Closed Palm

Wrap/Bond – tan, cream, brown – this one really needs to be divided into four sections.  Rather than just 2.  A ruler makes it easy to do. The point is to create a long strip of paper to wrap the leaf stems with.  Half a sheet is really too much.

Wrap/Bond

Wrap/Bond

Citron – on Yellow paper – draw four on one sheet of paper
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You’ll notice the “leaf” details in the willow and myrtle in the pic above.  Obviously, you could add that with pen, markers or crayon. The the details are not to be cut.   Also, I snipped the tops of the myrtle, so that the tips were angled with the leaves.  You will have an open palm (dark green) and closed palm frond (light blue).The closed palm will double as the hanger.

2. All full lines are to be cut/torn, dotted lines are to be folded. Some folds aren’t  marked above, but will be included in directions.  Start with the closed Palm Frond:

Closed Palm & step 3

Closed Palm & step 3

3.   Cut the sheet in half, diagonally.  Fold into a closed frond, starting with the long edge, moving toward the corner, about 1’ folds. Once you get to the very end, and see where the corner is, make a small tear to tuck the 1/4inch of the corner into the frond body, so that it doesn’t come loose.  A picture of that will be included later, along with the myrtle after it’s been cut and folded.

4. When cutting the wrap pieces be very careful to not cut beyond the lines,  you will have one long strip of paper which is necessary to bind the entire thing together, in the pic here I had only two per page, but it was more than I needed, so I suggest four per page.

Wrap/Bond - step 4

Wrap/Bond – step 4

The next pic is of everything, once it is cut.  You’ll notice the bond/wrap pulled out in a longer piece above, and also the ends of the myrtle that have been cut diagonally, and how each piece of myrtle is separated, with about 1 1/2 inch at the bottom not cut.

Everything Cut

Everything Cut

5.  Fold Myrtle in a bit off symmetry fashion, so that the fronds spread out some as in the pic below  The myrtle stem is KEY to making this all fit together!

Closed Palm, and Folded Myrtle Step 3 & 5

Closed Palm, and Folded Myrtle Step 3 & 5

6. Lay a willow face down behind the Myrtle, and fold the stem, tucking it into at least 1 fold deep of the Myrtle stem. I made a little cut in the myrtle stem, to tuck it back thru, for added security, as you can see below.

Step 6a

Step 6a

Step 6b

Step 6b

7.  Lay open palm on the folded closed palm, with the tip of the open palm no more than 1 inch from one end of the closed palm.

Step 7

Step 7

8. Face up, lay the Myrtle and willow on top of the palms, so that there are at least 2  inches of the open palm stem which extend beyond the myrtle stem, and  3 inches of closed palm stem which extend beyond the myrtle stem.

Step 8

Step 8

Now, for the wrapping.  9. Fold the wrap so that it   is a symmetrical line – as pictured  below – step 9a  and  tuck the beginning of the bond into the center of the myrtle stem (you may have to fold it  small enough to do this)  and then using folds and even tension (not enough to tear it), wrap the bond around the entire bunch, covering no more than 2 inches of the myrtle stem, and leaving the end of the myrtle stem visible.  Finally, tuck the end into the bottom of the wrap (opposite the stem end).  The finished product below.

Step 9a

Step 9a

Step 9 completed

Step 9 completed

10  Fold the citron stem, and tuck into the stem end of the myrtle or wrap.

Step 10

Step 10

11 Fold the green palm stem down, tuck thru the cut tab in the Citron and then into the bond/wrap.

Step 11

Step 11

12. Finally, fold the Closed Pam Backwards to be slipped between the top of your sukkah and the frame,  or backwards and around, tucking into the bond to hold it on a rail, twig, branch, etc. On a child’s bunkbed sukkah, this could be slipped between the mattress and the frame, or could be hung over the rail of their bed.  😀  It may also just be used to gently wave it in celebration!

Step 12

Step 12

Again,  Here is a pic of the finished Lulav – for celebrating the  Biblical Holdiay of Sukkot or Feast of Tabernacles with!  Happy feast to you!!

Finished Lulav!

Finished Lulav!

Considering Hell….

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Image of Lion in Fire... from For His Glory Flags dot com

The common belief is that Hell is an act of Yehovah. And that the cleansing fire, which cleanses the Earth is an act of Yehovah. I’m okay with that, however, I don’t think He will be superseding His own Laws to do that act. In fact, I’m more inclined to think He currently holds back His fire, which is un-natural for Him. (I can’t find the verse that states He does an un-natural thing… in one of the major Prophets I believe…)
Here’s what I’m thinking….
Yehovah is a consuming fire – right? (Heb 12:29)
Lucifer, a covering cherub, was on the Holy Mountain of Yehovah, and Walked amidst the fiery stones (Ez 28). Imagine that! Walking amidst, not just on, amidst… I’m thinking that’s got to be intensely hot – spiritually and physically!
Ps 24 says that those with clean hands and a pure heart may ascend the Hill of Yehovah, and may stand in His Holy Place.
Repeatedly we are told that those who Love Yehovah, the remnant, the Bride, the chosen will be refined in the fire… (Zach 13, Mal 3, 1 Peter 1)
I am coming to believe that when we submit to Yehovah, He slowly brings us into Himself, into Himself who is a Consuming FIRE, and Lovingly cleanses us, bit by bit as much as we can handle in any one instance, to the point that we will eventually ascend the Hill of Yehovah and stand in the midst of Fire. We submit to this, willingly, joyfully, and over time. The consuming of our sin includes Him bringing us to a recognition of it, our repentance, and our walking in newness of life, changing old habits, old thinking patterns, etc. His consuming doesn’t consume our bodies, it consumes our sin, the yuck and dross in our souls.  He does this with great LOVE, for He is also Love (1 John 4).

What if, perhaps, the fire of Hell is Yehovah himself, who does not withhold Himself Spiritually from the wicked (as He does now) and with nothing good in them, their evil is consumed as He draws them into His embrace. It will be torturous for them, as they will be brought to see their sin clearly; which, in my experience is not a comfortable revelation!!! – Just think about how you feel when someone confronts you with your sin, even when they do so lovingly!? Heart racing, flushed cheeks, a heaviness of heart, potentially even heart attack producing …  Eventually, the overwhelming horror of what they see will consume their souls and they will die.   Just as Nadab and Abihu were consumed when they entered the House of Yehovah unclean and with profane worship, Yehovah’s fire consumed their souls. They had walked into His very presence!    It was not un-natural to Himself, for a spiritual fire to flash and them to be consumed. It would have been un-natural for Him to hold His fire back, as He did when He passed before Moses, saying, “you may only see my backside, no one may see my face and live” (Ex 33) ….

Perhaps the cleansing fire upon the earth, which then burns up the bodies of the wicked (remember Nadab & Abihu were consumed, but their bodies still lay on the Tabernacle floor) and the rest of the earth is again, part of the Consuming fire which is Yehovah. The Natural, Hot Consuming Fire which burns and removes the physical effects of evil so that all things can be made new?

Point being, I’m much more inclined to believe that while Hell is an Act of Yehovah, it is not against His nature, nor Against His Laws of Nature. I believe the Fire which consumes spirit and body are both truly part of who Yehovah is.  I believe sin simply can not exist in the presence of Yehovah, it will be consumed…
Much better to submit to His refining process now!

Image of girl created by flames

Grateful Lists – January till Yehovah’s New Year… or thereabout. :)

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My grateful lists… unedited, and directly from my FB status’… there are a lot of gaps. I’ve either been living in the midst of grateful, or working thru some hard things on the days that got skipped…

Jan 1
Morning down time, Afternoon at Grandma’s, simple good food – I’ll gladly eat blackeyed peas, cornbread, greens, salad and mashed potatoes any day of the year! Reports of answered prayers and Yehovah’s moving, Art with my niece, glow stick tag with everyone (5 children, 1 teen, 5 adults) in the dark, sharing and conversation with family till late at night, knowing that the changes coming to all of our lives as our time in this little mountain town (my childhood hometown) is winding down, are good, even if hard – that YHVH will lead us well, my boys handled a late night visit very well – with no tears, Baths and time to unwind, Yehovah’s love and arms to rest in as I sleep.
My grateful list for Jan 1, and yours??

Jan 2

Sleeping in, prayers with boys, foes vanquished, Oil changed in one car, the other, My tinker toy out of the shop, with heat! Quiet alone time for each of us till lunchtime to reset from several weeks of going, going and lots of people. Sharing with friends, Bathroom cabinet sorted and cleaned, short naps, items for an organized bathroom and travel procured, supper by Grandpa and spending time talking with him (my dad), blog post finished (to be posted soon),
An EXCELLENT teaching on the Bride of Messiah… “Let Him kiss me with the kisses of His mouth”!! (and all it means in the Hebrew). The bride as ezer, encircles 7 times, as He leads … confirmation. Yep, definitely hearing this one by the Spirit. 😀
Sleep that is coming (I think 😉 )
That Yeshua is my True Husband, that I can safely rest in Him, that the wonder He brings to my life doesn’t end, and that His plans for me are good and perfect!

Jan 3

A new day, Seeing the road ahead, Shalom that worship in song brings, Little ones righted, first day back to partial school successful, Yehovah’s shalom, following in Obedience and knowing I can trust Him, every step forward, that I was heard well, and YHVH’s hand in another’s life can be trusted; confirmations in big and little ways, on more than one subject, in one evening, How YHVH is moving in the lives of others,
Long baths, good music, excellent teachings.
Yehovah’s love and incredible sovereignty in all things which can be trusted.
Shalom & rest that is coming momentarily.
That His mercies are new every morning, and that includes when my alarm goes off tomorrow. 🙂

Jan 4
His mercies are new every morning, watching the light slowly creep across frosty landscape, conditioning workout to get me in shape, morning with my boys, naps, enough school done that we are ready for a new week, sharing life, a quiet Sabbath (it’s been 5 weeks since my last Sabbath alone with Him), muscles that I forgot exist which will NOT let me forget right now 🙂 , sleep to follow shortly (and before midnite).
Yeshua’s incredible love, calling to us to be His Bride, to truly enter intimate relationship with Him thru the Spirit. Breathtaking!

Jan 5
Little boy’s desire to be with Momma in the early morning (I’d really rather he had been asleep, but I’m still thankful for these precious years of wanting Mom around :D), Sunrise on the Sabbath, A day of rest, Epsom Salts and a big bathtub, Naps, Conversation on long walks in the waning light, Food I didn’t prepare – steak as tender as my cheese sticks! Worship and excellent teaching. So timely, and confirming on many fronts. One such front is getting to wrestle with knowing His voice of when to speak the Truth within vs when to follow Amos 5:13. 🙂 Stretching – both spiritually, and physically.
That when I chose to trust YHVH’s sovereignty with the most intimate of relationships, that trust carries over into all other relationships and situations, so that I can truly delight in and trust the Sovereignty of YHVH in all things.
Yeshua’s love and willingness to bring us as His Bride, into the Holy of Holies, into the most intimate of relationships with Him, as we walk in obedience and surrender to His Covenant with us. ♥
Sleep coming shortly, and a new day tomorrow, which He will give me the strength for!

Jan 6

Morning workout. I can still move. Good food. Much accomplished – there’s actually a piano under all the books and pictures, and childhood treasures! Long talks with friends, Boys hair is cut. Shalom. Faith that YHVH will provide, even during a very slow winter. The grace to walk in obedience and love. His Mercies are new every morning.
Yeshua’s love.

Jan 7

Waking with a song, Snuggle bug in the morning, School finished well for the day, Sharing Joy, Boys asleep before 8:45, Laughing with my Dad, Long baths, Good reading material – “Life emerges in mystery, splendor, and infinite diversity. The old dies away, the new is born. We grieve our losses and are renewed in the process. The process of life sustains life, generates life, balances life, nurtures life and protects life in an infinitely delicate, infinitely complex living system. … Life in this reality requires great self-esteem and great trust in the process of life itself.” ~Patricia Evans (and I would add, Great trust in the Creator of Life), Sleep that is coming, and friends coming for a visit tomorrow.
Yeshua’s incredible love and faithfulness, that I can trust Him implicitly!

Jan 8
Good day at CC, making paint, catching up after a break, phone calls, one of my “besties” here to visit, long walks on the lake bed, kids playing happily, doing life together with friends, sharing stories, others to walk this path with,
that obeying Him in surrender and trust always pays off – that our lives have proven that over and over again, His mercies are new every morning and will be present when my alarm goes off, Learning to walk in “taking every thought captive” and the Victory He Brings!
Yeshua’s love, forgiveness, and straight out power!

Jan 10

Days of conversation, sharing life, joys, YHVH’s working, answered prayers with a friend. Kiddos playing with longtime friends; hugs, and cuddles from these dear children; brisk walks and someone to work out with if only for a day. The beauty & freedom that YHVH has brought to our lives as we’ve followed Him in obedience. The ministry of Be in Health, and those who have walked this journey before us. The Beauty of His timing, His plans, His direction – His incredibly divine orchestration which has brought so much healing and beauty… Shady V. YHVH’s deliverance. The Truth I know and the strength to hold it while walking in His way for me. That I can fully trust Yehovah and His plan for my life even on the “off” days. The Godly order He is moving me in for myself and my children daily.
Yeshua’s love, faithfulness, corrections, tender kindnesses, & incredible awesomeness which I can submit to in love as His Bride.

Jan 12 (morning)
Shabbat. A good week. A basically clean house. Time with other homeschool moms, The Healing that is being worked out NOW for myself and my family, that no weapon formed against us shall prosper, A Sabbath day ahead to rest, fellowship and be refreshed by YHVH – possibly in the midst of His Creation. That YHVH is ever faithful to lead us as we seek His face and are willing to obey and follow Him. His incredible love, gentleness and direction. I can trust Him with the details of my life. Shabbat Shalom.

Jan 12 (night)

Shabbat Shalom, A short nap, a long walk with my small group along a rushing stream, lunch creekside, knowing YHVH is doing a good work in all of our hearts, Fellowship and sharing life and the Joy of YHVH. Healing for my boys and their dad. Being able to name and stand in what is True. Talk time with my Mom. Rest and hammock time as the sun slowly dipped below the horizon, Phone calls with Joyous news, and also Shared life, encouragement, shalom and prayer. All that YHVH has done, is doing, will do. His incredible ability to orchestrate GOOD. Good teaching. The “Ache” – boy does that particular ministry seem to hit on it regularly. Steak and smashed turnip. Sleep coming shortly.
Yehovah’s love. That I can trust Him Daily with me.

Jan 13
11 hrs of sleep, catching up on news and reading, seeing the results of my hard work, dancing, being obedient YHVH’s directions to bring the spiritual into the physical, Andrew Peterson’s song – The Magic Hour, breezes coming thru open windows, the cleansing of fire & Mikvahs, Little boys showing off their muscles, playing games with them while talking about life, Playing board games with them, Answers to prayer for convictions, that YHVH will work out the details. Sleep coming soon, and a new week ahead.  What I know to be True.  Yehovah’s love and sovereignty that I can trust, daily, with every decision I make.

Jan 14

Waking to cuddly boys and rain on the window, Second full day of school for 2013 finished, Conversations about personal self-worth, love, and who is to captivate our hearts, and the gifts of YHVH in friendships with my boy, that the boys played well together today, It was warm enough for them to play outside in the rain, Nick’s testimony (posted earlier) and my cousin’s testimony, that His mercies are new every morning!
Yehovah’s love, and that I can trust Him with the details of my life.”

Jan 15

Extra, unexpected sleep, Slow Rainy days, Feeling like we did well with school today, Little boy hugs, Telling my boy about when the dam broke and flooded my childhood neighborhood (while on location), Watching two rivers collide, Signs of a boy growing up while out shopping, That he ate a huge salad for supper (I only dreamed of this day), Ice Cream – because we are healing and walking it out!! Board games circa 1977 – now that was a distant memory! Long baths. That His mercy is new every morning, and will be very present when my alarm goes off and I start my work out in the morning.
Yehovah’s plans for me are good, even if I have no idea what they are, I can trust Him, for He Loves me!!!

Jan 16
A good day of homeschool, stories from the Bible which lift our spirits, teaching my brother how to make matza, that our Messiah was striped and pierced for me, Soup, Salad, Breaking bread and communion with my fellowship, Sharing and receiving, reminders to consume the life of Messiah daily, Hope, Joy, Peace, Freedom from the devourer, Shalom.  Resting into His Plan for me, being able to Surrender to Him. That He gives perfect peace. Yeshua’s love.

Jan 17
Up and out the door on time. CC make up day today, so we don’t go longer into the spring. Our awesome tutors. Science & art projects. A box of citrus gifted us. A bit of downtime to recharge and go again. Cuddling with my boys during story time. That my boy is getting both his math and spelling – our persistence is paying off. Supper by Grandpa. Time to unwind with a book. Clear skies and the moon, with the smell of snow in the air (even if there isn’t any on the ground), Tomorrow is preparation day for Shabbat!!! Resting in YHVH’s arms tonight. Yeshua’s love and faithfulness to me as My true Husband. Knowing that He has all the details of my life in His hands!

Jan 18
Cuddling with my little one as the sun rises, the SUN!!!!, Hearing my oldest’s dreams as he sits on my lap, another good day of school – he’s doing well even with tons of wiggles, a house in order, the back porch livable again after a week of the boys making forts for the cat. That we have a cat, the boys have a closed in back porch space with lots of boxes to make forts for her, and she good-naturedly handles their toting her around, and stuffing her in boxes…, Sabbath’s sunset, Supper with my family – beginning Sabbath with my towheads & their grandpa, Night time cuddles and pillow talk with two bright boys, Your Story Hour, Ice Cream, long soaks, a good book – learning more about myself, good music; chatting with friends, sleep that is coming…
Yeshua’s loving arms… He’s got me.

Jan 19
Waking refreshed on a Sabbath morning, Clear directions for my day, Knowing YHVH has the details of the year and His provision in His hands, walking thru a door and knowing it’s a Divine Appointment, getting to be part of and to witness the walking out of conviction, open hearts, bridge building, shared meals, getting to bless, and be blessed, time with a childhood friend – sharing, receiving, encouraging… Divine appointment, The Joy of YHVH and dreams of His goodness as the sun hits my eyes in it’s last few moments before it sets, Dancing in praise to Him – that I’m stronger and can feel it, working out is paying off! 😀 Time to talk with my Dad when livestream faded, then thanks to information that it’s on my end, not livestream, and by prayer & faith of friends, I got to hear the entire message without any large interruptions. What a message!! The call to prayer, answering that call – His words, in my mouth – Wow. Chats & prayer & fellowship across the miles with dear friends.
Resting fully in Yeshua’s arms as I sleep.
His love, mercy, grace and direction – Heart so full!!!

Jan 20

Early wakeup call from YHVH, Sunrise, Prayer time to have a conversation with my best Friend, steady peace, music; that working out is having an impact on my body; Stacks of letters and cards of love and encouragement – memorials to a legacy of love and walking as best we know how, with Jesus; More music, Little boy hugs, Conviction to speak, His beautiful love and grace which calls us into the relational economy of His Kingdom, His faithfulness and everlasting Love.
Sleep that is coming and a new week to get to train my little Princes for His Kingdom.
Yeshua’s arms to rest in.

Jan 21
Morning sunrise thru the fog & prayer, little guy cuddles, Boys playing happily, despite our being completely out of synch with the clock school was actually accomplished today. Knowing He has the whole world, and our lives in His hands, and we can trust Him for the details. Yehovah’s provision.
Sleep coming soon in His arms.
Yeshua’s love and faithfulness.

Jan 24

Morning hugs from little guys, homeschool accomplished, seeing the fruit of our labor as we succeed, our Classical Conversations community, date day with my little guy, answered prayers, hearing Him, small group fellowship in the middle of the week to recharge, better morning today than yesterday, great people willing to walk our kids thru their manufacturing facility and help them learn and hopefully apply what they’ve learned, not only to their robotics project, but to life, animals who love petting and attention, “You’re a comfort to me Momma” :), Sunset, good music to dance to while preparing supper, Winter childhood memory comfort food of lentil stew on rice, topped with salad and homemade lemon & oil dressing – YUM! (and that my kids liked it! and are asking for salad now!!), boys learning to “do church” even if that’s just at home, around the table, listening respectfully, and attentively to a Pastor/teacher, exchanged massages with Dad, Sleep coming shortly.
Yehovah’s love, plan for our lives, provision and best of all, the desires He lodges in our hearts and then grows us to the point of being able to handle those dreams becoming reality.
That I can trust Him fully.

My grateful list for the past couple of days, and yours??

Jan 26

Goodnight world…
I’ve a hot date with my Heavenly Husband & Messiah in the early hours. He’s pushing me in beautiful ways but hard ways (he’s like that, loves that iron sharpening iron stuff. 🙂 What is more important to me – slumber or time with Him? interaction with others in person or online, or entering into His presence and abiding there for a season? Which comes first? Will I agree with the spirits set against me, or kick them to the curb and rejoice in His Loving Embrace??
He will give me strength for the walk-out of obedience to His calling & instructions(torah) for me personally, for He is good, and His mercies are new every morning!!

and that’s my grateful list for the evening too. 🙂 What are you grateful for??

Jan 27 – not really a proper grateful list, but something I’m grateful for…

Having skimmed thru journals from childhood to current today, I’m struck by the shift that occurred in my spirit as I read Journey of Desire, back in 2002. Up to that point, nothing healed, or changed me quite as profoundly. Thank you John Eldredge and Ransomed Heart Ministries!!
Since then, I’ve been on an incredible journey. Thank you, Yehovah!!

In thinking about it further – that shift, and the reading of Desire also coincided with an intentional move from chaos to more simple – the the 8 laws of health – making sure that there was good Nutrition, Exercise, adequate Water, daily Sunshine, Temperance in all things, fresh Air, adequate and complete Rest, and Trust in God – time spent with Him – in my Daily life. Looking back over the last 10 years – I gotta say, that was a good choice  So glad to still be on the journey, and to be able to look back and see the change in my spirit thru my writing.

Jan 28

A quiet weekend, listening to Him, Full Moon, quiet time in “Shakam Boqer”, more processing, on time conversations, hearing & knowing as He ordains, lil Men cuddles, another day of school finished, Excellent scores on Math and spelling tests, That His Mercies are new every morning!
Yeshua’s love, and that I get to rest in His arms tonight.

Jan 29

Early morning time with YHVH, little guy falling back to sleep in arms, Good day at CC, short naps, Date day with my boy, Neat handmade items, Sharing a table at our local coffee shop – hot cocoa for him, chai tea latte for me, My tinker toy to go 4 wheeling in, Lego play – I’d asked him what would make him feel really loved :), Salad and Checkers, Sleep coming shortly, His mercies will be new in the morning when my alarm goes off. I get to rest in Yeshua’s arms tonight.
Yehovah’s Sovereignty, Forgiveness and Love!

Jan 30
Warm enough for my window to be cracked, The sound of rain at waking, a full day – complete with an impromptu emergency preparedness class including, what to do in case of tornado. That no tornado was seen in our neck of the woods, and that tho my aunt has debris from it in her yard, it was not on the ground when it passed her house in GA! Fun with paint making asymmetrical and yet symmetrical shapes (paint on paper, fold paint in half, open it back up…) capable of being divided exactly in half. Working out. Good food, Fellowship. Yeshua’s love shining thru Paul’s letter to the Phillipians. His mercies are new every morning. I can follow and obey Him tomorrow, on one of the most full days of my week to “make it happen”. His love and that He Holds me close! Sleep that is coming.

Jan 31

Early morning with my Redeemer. Moon peeking thru clouds flowing cross the sky, His timing in taking me back to the things I’ve written to remind me of my path forward – my calling as Momma, lil guy cuddles, those little things that bring a smile and confirmation, school done by lunchtime! Relaxed robotics, Chatting with other Mommas, cold winter air, stacks of pancakes ready for future breakfasts, that my boys are learning to enjoy coloring and being quiet at times, some Sabbath preparations are done, talk time with a dear friend, Epsom Salts :), anticipation of His Plans and hearing the beauty He’s placing in other’s lives. Midnite munchies filled.

Yehovah’s love, sovereignty and shalom. Sleep that is coming, Resting in Him…

Feb 1
Early morning prayer time, a little exercise before the day took off, spur of the minute childcare, good news from the optometrist – vision is no longer worsening! & I can see clearly now! thanks to not wearing very scratched glasses, No place to hide and no need to, prayer time with those I love, Yummy hot soup on a very cold day, the three R’s covered, Shabbat Shalom, a quiet candlelight supper, cuddling with my boys, getting to write a bit, even if it was just a summary of my days for a friend, Sleep coming soon in His arms.
The rest of a weekend to spend with Him, walking in His leading for me. Yeshua’s love and mercy and grace!

Feb 2
Shabbat! Early morning sunlight, Quiet time with Him, Good teachings, Beautiful Music, Snow, Walking with Him in the Snow, His incredible cleansing and moving me forward toward More of the Good He has in store, Confirmations, Moving in the Spirit not only changes my life, but gives me a place in a much bigger story, Beauty, His Mercies which are new EVERY morning,
That I get to rest in His Arms tonight. Yehovah’s infinite love!

Feb 4
A full weekend of rest, snow, processing, cleansing, letting go, moving in rhythm with YHVH, moving forward, healing… That even with way too little sleep for Momma, we made it thru the day with our sanity intact, Little boys stories about their weekend, their endless energy, laughter, hugs, thinking and learning bout life. Confirmation to my spirit that yes, I’m walking out His way for me. Reminders of what still needs a ton of His grace to enable me to walk well as I choose His Way. That I truly can Trust Him for all of my needs. Sleep coming in YHVH’s arms. His Love and Sovereignty. His mercies which are new every morning.
My Grateful list for the last two days. What are you grateful for??

Feb 5
Extra sleep, Good day at CC, visits with Mom, even if they are very short; being Yeshua’s bride, under His provision.  The smell frankincense; little nudges; cuddle time with my boy; lego creating; warfare prayers; a short but effective massage from my Dad; sleep that is coming before 10:30.  His directions and grace to keep walking out His plan for my NOW.  Yehovah’s love.

Feb 6

Early mornings, Cleansing FIRE, stories of victory, the truth the memory of our sins are cast to the depth of the sea and our sin nature is entirely erased by His Consuming Fire of HOLY LOVE. Beauty from Ashes. Purity of heart. Direction from Him, Prayer for blessing a complete stranger and knowing He will answer. School finished well. A gift from YHVH by way of one of His. Good food. Fellowship with friends and family. The freedom He brings!
Yeshua’s love and that I can trust Him fully!

Feb 10 – mid-day

Safe travels, time to meditate and pray while driving, Shabbat Shalom, Beginning Sabbath with friends and good food, Fellowship with other believers, that YHVH uses so many to speak His truth to me, to bring me further along in His process of refining me, that He answers prayers, Getting to know a new friend; the shared joy of planning a surprise to bless, Excellent food & Fellowship. That Darda Lyn came into my life this past year and has another year of life ahead full of Blessings from YHVH! Happy Birthday Mama Darda!! I praise Yehovah for you!!!
Talk time and shared prayers, sleeping in, and a day ahead to spend with Him.
Yehovah’s love, timing, presence and word to me to trust the He in me. He is so very good!

My grateful list for the past couple of days, and yours??

Feb 11

Weekend full of fellowship, community and profitable midrash. (and very little sleep.) It’s cool when you come to the same conclusion from three different and equally applicable & Scriptural perspectives. Water lapping, shared dreams, geese landing. Just on time Divine appointments, Seeing YHVH’s incredible orchestration of life. That beauty does come from ashes. Good food, card games played in fun, On time/Oh MY Wow! teachings, being gifted by Him with seeing the big picture of what YHVH is doing within His Body & Bride.
Safe travels in the rain, little boy cuddles and creativity, long epsom salt baths, dead sea salt scrub.. Sleep that is coming very soon!
Yehovah’s incredible love and his wooing me to repentance and deeper relationship with Him, to trust what I know, what He is speaking thru the gift of the Holy Spirit to me. Beautiful!

Feb 12

Having another car to drive when mine wouldn’t start, A good day at CC, a long hard nap, warfare and believing that YHVH is healing this head drainage, little boutiques full of pretty baubles, Italian ice cream, knowing my taxes will be taken care of, Good food, boys in bed, a neck massage, rain on my window and the tin roof, sleep coming very shortly.
Knowing He is in me and is faithful to take care of all my needs, and to walk with me thru all He brings me to face.

Feb 15
A little boy’s glee over his 100% Spelling test, Yehovah’s provision is sure, Chiropractor’s and massage therapists, surreal moments when mental picture, smell and Him all collide; lots of drive time to spend in prayer, praise and chatting with a couple dear friends, AWD and snow – beautiful snow in the dusk blanketing one of my favorite valleys to drive thru, Hanging out with family in Snowy WV – worship, food, sharing life with two of my favorite women in the world, Soft tissue to catch my nose, Crisp frosty air and moonlight, that tomorrow I get to ski – or try to remember how 🙂
Yehovah’s love and perfect timing that I can always trust!
My grateful list for the last few days – What are you grateful for??

Feb 21

Safe travels along country roads, The Psalms set to music by Sons of Korah, catching up with friends, the innocence of my children; slow days of “spring break part 1”, help with emergency roof repairs, date days with little boys; Long baths, that Yeshua became our Sin Eater, That His Spirit lives and moves in those who look to Him, that He sets some Apart for such a time and place, that we all get to choose to work in cooperation with Him in the time and place we are called to (lessons from life… and “The Last Sin Eater” Francine Rivers – great read, worth giving up sleep for. 🙂 ), that my eldest’s first book to pick up and read, and say he enjoyed reading, was Scripture (Yehovah will you please give me all I need to raise this man-child to step into the time and place you call Him to, with the Integrity & Strength he will need to Stand) ; All Yehovah is doing in the world, in His people, in those I know or know of from afar, and those I walk with up close and personal. His incredible Orchestra. Provision that I know will come by His hand. That He rewards the obedience of His Chosen ; Days when the physical calls the spirit and soul to go deep, to be set apart into the waters of cleansing of the Him Space – He in Me.
Yehovah’s love, calling. That Yeshua is the True Shelter that Boaz, the kinsman redeemer points to. The protection He provides both “in the field” and in response to the scandalous risk of incredible intimacy in “uncovering His feet” – there is safety there, for “His left arm would be (is) under my head and His right arm around me.” Sngs 8:3
wow… :’-) ❤
Healing tears. I was born for THIS.
My grateful for the last four days… What are you grateful for?

Feb 23 (Sabbath morning)

Slow days of grace, tears of healing, pondering, catching up with friends – community even at a distance, Laughter – tears streaming laughter, taking the risk of deep vulnerability and the beauty which follows in further conversation, the gift of the written word, that my wakeful dreams have changed over the years from dark to light, The nudge to look into the eyes and truly see, The gift of singing with others, colors swirling,
Preparation day, boys helping with those preparations, Shabbat Shalom! Yes – we really are born for this! The hope of YHVH’s redemption & deep healing when I pray for my friends, Physical reminders of Spiritual realities, Sons of Korah – I know, I’ve mentioned them several times, but man the Psalms have been a huge blessing this week!! Purim and all it reminds us of…
Drizzly Sabbath Mornings and the voices of my little boys playing happily. Yehovah’s unending love, His healing, His Shalom. That I can wait safely in the crook of His arm, in His Shelter… His green “shelter”.
Shabbat Shalom!!!

My grateful list for the last few days, What are you grateful for today??

Feb 24

Sabbath rest, Time with my mom and her family, sharing life, love, food and a friendly game, Worship and teaching online, Beautiful sunsets, The sound of the dove and spring peepers in the valley below, Creative writing, Yehovah’s redemption and healing in surprising ways. One last “slow day” before we hit the ground running again. More time to write. Music. Little boy laughter, cuddles and games. Full moon rising opposite the sunset. Rushing river, a small fire, the smell of wood smoke lingering. “Shadow tag” with my boys. Boys sleeping soundly. Sharing life with a friend via chat. Watching others see Him in a new way. The truth that I know. The joy of Waiting upon the Lord. (Yehovah). His incredible love, healing and plans for good.
My grateful list for the last day and a half, and yours??

Feb 25

Living a life that’s flexible enough to pick up and do school on the go; drive time thru for thought, prayer and conversation, Yehovah’s right on time provision – and knowing that He’ll provide for the transportation needs, in the midst of musical cars; That the boys’ dad got to see their spelling curriculum in action today – it’s a learning curve, but he needs at least a working knowledge for those times when the boys are reading to him, or he is dictating something to them. Walks to Waterfalls to run off energy from boys sitting in the car for several hours. That they did sit in the car a lot today, and did well, with very little complaining. Conversations with the boys about the things YHVH has given their mother and father to teach them. A teaching moment of Daffodils “rescued” from down a hill and thru brambles to make their Momma feel special. Supper I didn’t have to fix. Purim “play” done by friends and acquaintances and streamed online. That my “Mommy Diagnostics of health related issues” works via txt too. 😀 Talking with a friend.
Laughter at the end of a long day. Sleep that is coming. Yehovah’s love.

Feb 26
A good day at CC, Pink and Purple and dressing up, Little one’s love for shiny/pretty, Fun celebrating Purim with my boys and Mom, Esther’s story of calling and walking in Him, the child of a dear friend, Sleep coming before 11 pm, Yehovah’s love and provision.

Feb 27
A good day of school. Short naps. Catching up with friends. Abiding hope that YHVH’s dreams give. Beef/Lentil stew and cornbread. Spending time with friends celebrating the coming of a wee one. Pedicures. Boys in bed when I got home. Long baths. Sleep that is coming momentarily.
Yehovah’s love and provision, and perfect timing.

March 1

Shabbat is here, school done this week, my Boy is READING! on his own choice and likes it :), Time with the Robotics Moms, A ride provided. Hope from HIM for those who are hurting and in the midst of stuck. Chiropractors. Answers. A clean house! Boys hugs. White stuff falling outside. Catching up with Friendships near and far.
Shabbat Shalom!
Sleep that is coming very soon.
Yehovah’s incredible love.

March 5

YHVH’s timing. In Yehovah do I trust. His deep healing. Altars of sacrifice. Freedom. Confirmation. Prayers of others. All the Way, my Savior leads me. Yeshua. His Love. Faith.My grateful list for the last few days – What are you grateful for??March 7Shabbat. Be in Health™ . Processing. Yehovah’s work in my life. Freedom. Long walks with Him. Physical real world ways to walk out spiritual realities. Total Surrender to Him. That I can trust Yehovah, He is trustworthy. Wholly His. Slow days for resting. Quiet Knowing. Confirmation. Shalom. Schoolwork getting done even in the midst of recuperating and slow. New Legos and 30 year old toys and games to keep boys occupied for hours. Picture of Aviv barley – wondering if there will be enough to declare the new year and the First Fruits celebration. Yehovah’s plans, yet unknown, for our Passover. The small weight of infants in arms. Snow. Little boy hugs. Hearing my boy read. Stories that build our faith.
Dishes done. Watching History in the making. Sleep that is coming.
Yehovah’s incredible love, timing, plans. I put my Trust in HIM!
My grateful list for this week so far – What are you grateful for this week?March 15Much to be grateful for this week. Shabbat is here. I survived the time change. Healing and freedom walked out. Being part of Yehovah’s Plan for Good. Incredible timing – His timing that I get to see in the world around me. Our Homeschool community. Conversations with Friends. Time with family, my small group, my boys. A boy who has a smile on his face when I tell him it’s time for Reading. Math class cookies. Wheels that will be dependable according to His Plan. Yehovah’s provision and bills paid. Having visitors from Germany – the boys are looking forward to time with them. A liveably clean house. Picnics with little boys. Sunsets and storm cloud glow. New Moons – Yehovah’s Calendar. A mind to wrestle thru the questions, and The Spirit who leads into all truth. That I have the privilege of celebrating the dedication of a little one’s to the Lord by her parents tomorrow. The ways in which He holds us thru the midst of Hard. Sleep that is coming shortly. Yehovah’s love, patience, timing, direction, healing!!

Some things I’m grateful for in this very long week, What are you thankful for??

March 22
Shabbat is here! Spending late nights catching up with dear friends while little ones drift to sleep, Yehovah’s timing – so perfect. Being willing to wrestle and hold loosely; that with YHVH I can face Fear squarely and not run, or compromise. That YHVH is healing me as I continue to Walk Out His way. The Grace of fellowship and Yeshua’s Love in the midst of seeing things differently.
Answered prayers. Catching up with friends. A straightened house, and a clean back porch. Direction for my weekend. Myrrh and Epsom Salts. Unending Hot water. Candle light and Shalom.
Sleep that is coming in Yeshua’s arms.
That I can walk in patience and total trusting, knowing that Yehovah is Good, and Has Good for me and mine. Shabbat Shalom!!

A few of the things I’m grateful for this week. What are you grateful for??

April 5

Wow… Two weeks that I’ve been living in the midst of grateful, and not writing it down… Some highlights:
A young friend who became a brother in the Messiah
Late night talks with His dear Momma
Days to prepare for Passover
A Beautiful Passover celebration – Music, Food, Yeshua’s Life and death, Scripture, Dance, The beauty of knowing another even when the language He spoke & sang was not our own, slow meals, and celebration
High Shabbat of Unleavened Bread – a slow day with my boys, perfecting my aim, Sunshine and flowers from my little guy
Preparing for friends to arrive.
That they arrived just before Shabbat did, and oh what a beautiful weekend! Yummy Food, Delightful Fellowship, Fresh Air, Beautiful spring Flowers, Fire and Rain, Long talks, Ministry, a touch of sleep, A slow Feast of First Fruits (bikkurim) morning, Celebrating His Resurrection, Waving “first fruits” and the Shofar echoes, Long afternoons of rest and slow walks, Help in the morning with cleaning, lots and lots of hugs from big and little…
A slow week to be had… sometimes even a tummy bug is a bit of a blessing in disguise.
Long talks and being heard. That Yeshua has us all in the midst, and that the work He started will be completed, even if it looks far different from what we might have imagined.
Time Will Tell!! Remembering, on the Last High Shabbat, the Exodus adventure on dry ground thru the Red Sea.
A little school done
Rest, sunshine
Prayers with friends, for friends. Sharing life with others, what pure gift!
Shabbat is Here Again!!!
Yehovah’s love, that He is faithful to refine us, that we can trust His fire, That we can face all He has for us to face. That He is gentle, and loving and Beautiful!!!

just a few things I am grateful for… What are you grateful for??