Category Archives: Our Creator’s Set Apart Days

Yehovah’s Date Days


Recently, I had the opportunity to write my personal summary of the beauty contained within Yehovah’s Date Days! Can’t wait till my next date day with Him!

The feasts are incredible prophecies, the spring feasts were fulfilled tho I’ve a hunch there is still a bit more to come as every feast had a now, intermediate, and long-term prophecy imbedded within it…, but the beauty is, observing Passover is the original “communionImage of Bride & Groom under Tallitn service” and celebrating it as believer in Messiah is in direct obedience to Yeshua’s words.  There is no “animal sacrifice” saying His death didn’t occur – only bread, wine, food, celebration, and a remembering of him, broken for us.  The week of Unleavened Bread is an incredible reminder to eat only of His sinless life, to take in HIS word and remove all leaven from the soul food that we eat.  The feast of First fruits reminds us clearly that he was the FIRST fruit, raised from the dead…  Shavuot, or Pentecost, celebrated on the day the 10 commandments were given and many centuries later when the Holy Spirit fell upon the disciples reminds us that we are to worship in SPIRIT and in TRUTH.  This is the giving of the covenant, the marriage ketubah or contract! This is the Bride’s day to rejoice that her Husband, Yeshua has made a contract, a promise that He is and will keep!

The fall feasts on the other hand… Have yet to see their final fulfillment, tho they’ve had intermediate fulfillments already. Image of Shofar blowers -   The Day of Trumpets announcing “The Bridegroom Cometh!”, based on the word of Two Witnesses. The people, coming out of their fields of harvest, washing and putting on their prior prepared white linen robes to Sound the Shofar and announce the coming of judgment and the bridegroom.  The 10 days of awe between Day of Trumpets (Yom Teruah) and Atonement, the time of asking, is there any sin remaining? Is there anything that stands between me and the Father reminds me of EGW’s words regarding this rending of soul by the saints…  Atonement – the judgement day. The day when the names are final in the book of life. The day when the Jubilee trumpet sounds and announces the Sabbath year, the millennium.  The day that the Sanctuary of our hearts is fully cleansed.  It’s an awesome, terrible, beautiful day of fasting and praising Father for the Gift of his Son who makes us all worthy, whose life and death mean our names are in His book!
And Feast of Tabernacles.. The feast of “and the Word became flesh and Tabernacled among us”. The feast that lasts 8 days, where temporary dwellings are built, and we look back to when He lived with us in the desert and we look forward to the time when He will live with us, Tabernacle with us, not only in our hearts, but with us bodily.

Image of Bride & Groom under Chuppah

A Bride & Groom stand under a “Temporary Dwelling” called a Chuppah

 This is the “Wedding Feast of the Lamb” – This is the culmination of the incredible romance that He, Father God has called us into. This is the restoration of all things.  And there is this neat little ceremony, the Water Libation when they pray for the Latter Rain (part of the intermediate fulfillment)… Yeshua stood, in the temple, at the moment of silence before the water was poured on the altar, and defined what they were doing, when his voice rang out, “I am the living water!! If any man thirsts let him come to Me and Drink”.. John says he was talking about the Holy Spirit… the true latter rain!
No, These feasts in no way make naught out of the Life, Death, Resurrection and soon return of Messiah nor are they dead bones of false religion or a “to do list”, rather, they are living rehearsals, a live drama of the Plan of Salvation, of incredibly infinite good things to come, the substance of those things being Yeshua – and our relationship of intimacy with Him! For we who were once foreigners are now brought nigh into the commonwealth of Israel, into the marriage relationship Yehovah intended for us to have with Him.

As Paul said, “”For Christ, our Passover lamb, has been sacrificed. Therefore let us keep the Festival, not with the old yeast of malice and wickedness, but with bread without yeast, the bread of sincerity and truth” (I Cor. 5:7-8, NIV).   YES! let us keep the feasts! Even the spring feast of Unleavened Bread and Passover. Not with a sacrifice, not with the leaven of malice and wickedness but with Sincerity and Truth!!
For He is our Passover Lamb, He is our First Fruits, He is our Husband and He has given a new covenant to write his Ketubah within our hearts!  He is the Bridegroom yet to return! He will judge the quick and the dead and the sons of men and He will welcome us to the Wedding supper of the Lamb!  HalleluYah!

Image of the Bride of Christ caught up to meet Him in the air


For other posts from Beloved of YHVH about the Feasts of Yehovah, please follow this link:


New Moon – a look at when the month begins


This is not my study.  I want to credit first, our Father, Yehovah, for His leading, and second the author, Frank Klin, who wrote the following on a FB thread.  This was a new look at an old discussion.. at least, it was a new to me look and it’s beautiful, and really goes to the heart of our Father, not the semantics which so often get argued over at length, but the whole of Scripture, which portrays the Heart of Our God.  I was blessed, and hope you will be also!  🙂

Phases of the Moon

“Dear brothers and sisters. I share the following for your consideration on this topic. I believe the Scripture identifies precisely how to identify when the New Moon begins. The foundational verses are found in the first book of the Torah, and the same theme continues all the way through to the end of Revelation. I preface the study with these verses:

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning.” – (James 1:17 KJV)

“This then is the message which we have heard of him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all.” – (1 John 1:5 KJV) 

Now consider what you just learned about our Father as you read these familiar verses:

“And God said, Let there be light: and there was light. And God saw the light, that it was good: and God divided the light from the darkness. And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.” – (Genesis 1:3-5 KJV)

Because Jesus is the Son of the Father of lights He began the first day of creation on the earth that was without form and void by speaking the words “Let there be light.” He then divided the light from darkness calling the light Day. So this new day was identified by the fact that “there was light.” 
For God to truly be light, “and in Him is no darkness at all,” the Son of God did something special on the fourth day of creation:

“And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years: and let them be for lights in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth: and it was so. And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: he made the stars also. And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth,” – (Genesis 1:14-17 KJV)

The Son of the Father of lights spoke two great lights into existence as a division between day and night, the sun being the greater light to rule the day, the moon being the lesser light to rule the night. These lights were to be for signs, for seasons, (moeds, appointed times), for days, and years. All this was done so there could be lights in the firmament of heaven to give light upon the earth.

On the fourth day of creation, the very first day of existence for this New Moon ask yourself did the moon begin dark, or did it begin as light? The verses we just read identify the moon as a lesser light to rule the earth at night. It is only during its cycle of days that this light becomes dark. When the moon is dark what lights the night? Our Scripture says “He made the stars also,” and they give light to the night when the moon is dark. 

Can the moon still be considered to rule the night if it is not shining? Yes, but during its dark phase it gives no benefit. It does not light the night. When a light that was once shining has been turned off when will the light be new or renewed? If the Son of God tells us a new moon is the first day of a new month, can we glean from the verses in Genesis when the moon’s cycle begins again? I propose Scripture is telling us the moon becomes new when it once again begins to light the night just like on the very first day it was created. New Moon = New Night Light. This is in keeping with the identity of our God as the Father of lights, in whom there is “no darkness at all.” 

Do a search through Scripture of the words associated with darkness and light, and see if our Father leads you to the same conclusion. My understanding of when to identify the New Moon is further enhanced as I read the following words of Paul, “Do all things without murmurings and disputings: that ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world;” – (Philippians 2:14-15 KJV)

When we have darkness in us can we shine as lights to the world? When the moon is dark can it shine as a light to the night? What happens when we come out of darkness into the light? We become a new creature. When the moon comes out of darkness into light it becomes a new moon, once again able to bring light to the earth.

“Then I saw that wisdom excelleth folly, as far as light excelleth darkness.” – (Ecclesiastes 2:13 KJV) 

“…if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.” – (1 John 1:7 KJV)

“For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.” – (2 Corinthians 4:6 KJV)

“O house of Jacob, come ye, and let us walk in the light of the LORD.” – (Isaiah 2:5 KJV)

“And the LORD went before them by day in a pillar of a cloud, to lead them the way; and by night in a pillar of fire, to give them light; to go by day and night:” – (Exodus 13:21 KJV)

“And it came between the camp of the Egyptians and the camp of Israel; and it was a cloud and darkness to them, but it gave light by night to these: so that the one came not near the other all the night.” – (Exodus 14:20 KJV)

“For thou wilt light my candle: the LORD my God will enlighten my darkness.” – (Psalm 18:28 KJV)

“The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?” – (Psalm 27:1 KJV)

“For with thee is the fountain of life: in thy light shall we see light.” – (Psalm 36:9 KJV)

“The day is thine, the night also is thine: thou hast prepared the light and the sun.” – (Psalm 74:16 KJV)

“Unto the upright there ariseth light in the darkness: he is gracious, and full of compassion, and righteous.” – (Psalm 112:4 KJV)

“All the bright lights of heaven will I make dark over thee, and set darkness upon thy land, saith the Lord GOD.” – (Ezekiel 32:8 KJV)

“Again, a new commandment I write unto you, which thing is true in him and in you: because the darkness is past, and the true light now shineth.” – (1 John 2:8 KJV)

“Arise, shine; for thy light is come, and the glory of the LORD is risen upon thee. For, behold, the darkness shall cover the earth, and gross darkness the people: but the LORD shall arise upon thee, and his glory shall be seen upon thee.” – (Isaiah 60:1-2 KJV)

“The sun shall be no more thy light by day; neither for brightness shall the moon give light unto thee: but the LORD shall be unto thee an everlasting light, and thy God thy glory. Thy sun shall no more go down; neither shall thy moon withdraw itself: for the LORD shall be thine everlasting light, and the days of thy mourning shall be ended.” – (Isaiah 60:19-20 KJV)
~ Frank Klin

Again, Thank you, Frank for this Study!!  May Yehovah Bless you!!

Unleavened Bread – A Sign? A Frontlet? – Cliff notes


Each year, each feast, without fail, I learn something new…  The following are the cliff notes from what I learned last year (look here for the long version) , which is still very precious to me and has to do with the following verses:

Speaking of the Feast of Unleavened Bread, YHVH says, in Exodus 13:16:
“It shall be as a sign on your hand and as frontlets between your eyes, for by strength of hand the Lord brought us out of Egypt.”

and, in Exodus 13:9,10
“It shall be as a sign to you on your hand and as a memorial between your eyes, that the Lord’s law may be in your mouth; for with a strong hand the Lord has brought you out of Egypt.  You shall therefore keep this ordinance in its season from year to year.”

Sign on hands, memorial/mark between eyes… sounds vaguely familiar… mark of the beast on the hands, mark on the forehead??? Is there a connection??

This is My Body….

In my study, I found no direct connection between the word origins, however, there is a clear juxtaposition between the True sign/mark (looking at Exodus 13 & the Deut texts)  and a counterfeit mark (mark of the Beast) … It shouldn’t surprise us that the enemy has a counterfeit!!

My next question is, Why is the Feast of Unleavened Bread to be a sign on our hands, a mark between our eyes?

Why would it be the true “mark” of YHVH?!

and, the answer, I grew to understand, goes to this

I realized that the very first Week of Unleavened Bread – from Egypt to the Red Sea – showed the entire plan of salvation… It starts with the Passover Lamb, deliverance from bondage, and the choice to follow Him in faith, into the Wilderness… where we travel, day and night, following His Cloud, His Pillar of fire. It’s a faith walk, it’s hard, it can be exhausting, but He provides.  The week comes to it’s climax with us “entangled in the land” with no where to go, and our enemy right behind us, and us waiting on the Lord for His deliverance to come… Finally, on the Last Day, the High Sabbath of Unleavened Bread – we cross over on dry land, and our enemy is ENTIRELY consumed.   Isn’t that the big picture?  Accepting the Lamb, walking by Faith, trials that test our faith, and eventually all evil consumed?! What an incredible “sign” to be infused in our thoughts and deeds!!!

What is incredibly cool is the VERY WORDS of the Hebrew Text verify and confirm this truth!!!

Hebrew has changed thru the years, as one might imagine.  To begin with, it was in “Pictograph” form.  Next it moved to Paleo-Hebrew, which is strikingly similar to the Phoenician Alphabet.  It then moved to what we know today as modern Hebrew, depicted in the examples given above.  Interestingly tho, we can often follow the letters back to their pictures, and get a picture story of what the word means!

The above covers the basics, however in the examples below, I also used “Hebrew Letters & How They Grew” by AJ Cannon-Dalbey

The Hebrew word “Sign” looks like this, and is read Right to Left:


Breaking the letters down to their beginnings, and Reading from Right to Left:

letter name – picture – meaning:
Aleph – Ox Head – Strong, Power, Leader, Yoke

Vav – Nail/tent peg, secure, pierce – can also mean hook, join

Tav – Crossed Sticks – mark, sign, signal, monument – can also mean covenant, ownership… and, of special note, just to repeat – the original picture was crossed sticks – Yes, the first “sign of the cross” pun intended!

So, the word “Sign” from Exodus 13, which is to be on our hands,  in pictures takes us directly back to the Passover Lamb – THE LAMB of YHVH !!!

The Strong Leader, who was pierced, on a cross, and by so doing secured the covenant and sealed us!!

do you notice that Aleph also means yoke? Reminds me of Someone who said His Yoke was easy 😉

And the Hebrew word for Frontlet??  Sorry, I can’t find a picture of it, This is as large as I can get it…


Breaking it down, reading from Right to Left:

letter name – picture – meaning:
Tet – Basket – Surround, contain, mud – can also mean snake, twist
Vav- Nail/tent peg – secure, pierce – can also mean hook, join
Tet – Basket – Surround, contain, mud – can also mean snake, twist
Pey – Mouth –  blow, scatter, Edge – can also mean to speak, to open, the beginning (think “in the beginning YHVH spoke and it was so”), enter, command
Vav – Nail/tent peg, secure, pierce – can also mean hook, join
Tav – Crossed sticks – mark, sign, signal, monument – can also mean covenant, ownership… and, of special note – just to repeat, the original picture was crossed sticks – Yes, the first “sign of the cross” pun intended!

Do you see it??  Red Sea Crossing??? Pharaoh, with his snake hat becomes secured in the mud, when YHVH blew a strong wind, then commanded the waters to fall again, thereby securing a sign, the signal and His ownership over His people that they were His and they were, truly, Free! 

Looking forward… That great enemy of ours, the serpent, will be secured,contained, surrounded, in the mud (in the pit?), snake that he is, when YHVH opens His mouth and commands, whereby Securing His Everlasting Covenant of Peace, Securing His ownership, and giving us a sign, a signal that We are HIS and We are Truly Free and the Snake is completely and utterly destroyed, just as Pharaoh was on the bottom of the Red Sea!!!

And that’s why the Song of Moses and the Song of the Lamb is our Song!!! (Rev 15)

Now that’s a promise I’ll keep before my eyes and thoughts anyday!!!  That’s why Unleavened Bread is a Sign, A Frontlet – Because, in one week, it tells Our story – both our individual stories of redemption, and the Epic Story of the entire World’s redemption, in an unfolding live drama of Shadow pictures!!!

Gabriel’s Visit – Happy Chanukkah!!


As a child, it always bothered me that we celebrated Christ’s birth at Christmas, but knew he wasn’t really born then and didn’t know when He was born. That didn’t compute in my inquisitive mind. Years later, I was thrilled to learn it was possible, with study of Scripture, a second witness in Jewish culture, and astronomy, to pinpoint Yeshua’s birth to the Feast of Tabernacles… when the Word became Flesh & Dwelt (the Greek word used means Tabernacled) among us! 😀

In that timeline, Mary conceived of the Holy Spirit 6 mos after Elizabeth (just after Pentecost) did. It’s VERY likely, that the angel Gabriel and Holy Spirit visited her this week during Hanukkah (which means Dedication in Hebrew), as the Light of the World began his journey to redeem us, restore us and dedicate us, the Living stones of His temple. 😀

In Honor of Gabriel’s Visit, and the Conception of our Messiah;
I offer the following song written & originally performed by the Machens –
The Lord is With You
This is the best cover rendition I can find of it, and on the youtube page, has a link below and to the left for purchase of the album it comes from.

The first time I heard it, several years ago, while watching the Christmas in the Smokies drama at Dollywood, It resonated so deeply that I cried… and went home and searched and searched till I found who’d written it, and bought the album – which has lots of great songs in it, but this one remains my favorite!!
Here’s a private recording of the song in that show.

If you’d like to know a bit more about why I believe Yeshua was conceived during Hanukkah, and born at Sukkot/Tabernacles please see the following blog, and follow the links provided there.

In a land, far from Home


This was originally posted Nov 1, 2011, two months after my marriage ended and revised on Oct 31, 2012.  Some things have changed, (see the notes at the bottom),  there’s been a lot of healing… However, the intent of the blog remains the same.
*Reader’s note – Please do not take this blog as a personal attack, nor as judgement towards you. I respect choices of my friends and family in how they live their lives. I will not, nor do I want to force my beliefs onto you – if you want to know more, please ask, I’m not likely to offer other than bits tucked here and there on this blog. If you disagree, please do so respectfully.  The following is my story and where I’m at, my processing tonight…

Tonight, I feel a bit out of place. Ok. A lot out of place. Very much like the exile – in a foreign land, far from home.

image of costumed people and craggy tree in black against orange sky

For the last 6 years, on this night, especially, I have prayed for “my mountain”, Yahweh’s Mountain really.  He claimed it and pressed me to pray for it and all the people who lived there within a few months of moving to it. I’ve claimed it regularly since then, for Him, His use… I dedicated it once more before I left the place that I’d once made and called home. The place I’d poured my heart into, the place my children know as home… the place my husband always felt foreign to cause he was on the road for most of those 6 years and somehow had bought the miserable ass lie that he didn’t fit, was an outsider…  It was home to us tho, the boys and I, and I dedicated it, and our Mountain to Yahweh one last time before leaving.  I let it go.  I had to. There were way too many factors that made it not a safe place to be. I don’t regret that decision. I returned to my Father’s house and I know that is the absolutely right place for me to be… still, it’s hard, still I feel like an exile.

Tonight, it feels more poignant. Usually, on this night, after the boys were in bed at their normal bedtime, with no sugar overdoses; I would spend time in prayer, warrior princess warfare prayer, for “my” mountain.  Backwoods boys do tricks in ways that are dangerous.  Bonfires lit in the middle of the road, trees felled across it…  So, those prayers were first for literal, physical safety for the inhabitants of the mountain who might come across such “tricks”… but those prayers were also for the spiritual safety and sanctuary to be felt by the inhabitants of the mountain – human and animal.  Yes, I prayed for the animals who lived there too – the deer, the fox, the bear and our resident mama mountain lion (she should have been sighted this year, but I’ve not heard any reports of her or her cubs – I’m a bit worried about her this fall), as well as the black panther that had been sighted further up the mountain. Part of the prayer for the animals did have an ulterior motive… namely that they would feel the peace of their Creator when they were on my property, and that they would recognize the presence of the Divine in ways that was honoring of them, and protective of my children who daily played in the yard, despite the fact that both the bear and the mountain lion have been sighted within sight of the cottage.
I also prayed for the people… for their spirits to feel the Presence of their Maker, for protection from demonic forces, and from the sinister nature of our Enemy’s use of this and other of his “holy” days in ways that are unspeakably horrific and terribly evil. I prayed against any such events from taking place on “His” mountain, and dedicated the land therein to Yahweh.
That’s how I normally spend Oct 31….

Tonight tho, I’m not there… it’s not my mountain, tho I do still love it – the elevation, the climate, the wildlife…. Tonight I’m an exile wandering in the wilderness and desolate land of broken trust.

Yes, of course, I could pray. I could dedicate this mountain to Him. I could dedicate “That” mountain to Him… but, the sense of need, of calling isn’t there tonight as it has been the last 6 years…

This tho, is just a little taste of something I’ve always felt on this night… A longing for my True Home.

My first “school” experience was in a little preschool program that started at the end of my driveway, when I was 4 or 5…  Being so close to home, my mom thought it was a good opportunity and enrolled me. The teachers were nice, and I got to meet some of our nearby neighbors, as most of the teachers and staff lived nearby.  Things went well, to my memory till Halloween rolled around.  I was a gentle child, Highly sensitive, not only to external stimuli like noise and textures, but also to His Spirit and to all things Holy & Good, as well as all things sinister and evil, including innocuous things like toys that depict any degree of evil intent.  As such, Halloween decorations absolutely frightened me.  Put me quickly into tears.  Mom tells me she removed me from the school at about that time, cause, to her credit, she saw that it was not good for my tender heart. Still, as I recall, we went trick or treating that year. That was the year that the witch came out of one house, the one just above the entrance to the “Piper’s” development, and I broke into tears on the spot.   I think I “might” have gone trick or treating another 3 years… maybe. Seems like I chose to stay home after that….
A 4 year old exile, wandering… so far from Home, not belonging in the foreign culture I found myself in.

For most of my life I’ve wondered about some of the Bible, some of the culture… the worship, the Feasts, the meaning…. Almost 4 years ago now, I started on a journey to deeper understanding. It started with the History Channel’s program about Christmas. Sure, I’d heard the origins of Christmas were pagan, but really hadn’t thought it out in terms of what was consistent with my faith and beliefs. Here was a secular program, it wasn’t one of the “Christmas is evil” Christian naysayers.  It penetrated deep.  Did you know that Christmas originally looked a whole lot more like the revelry and debauchery of Halloween and Mardi Gras all mixed together? Did you know that the early Pilgrims from Europe did not celebrate Christmas because of it’s roots?  Did you know that many of the stories, and even the attire of the Jolly Man in Red were introduced in America by retail store advertisers like Sears, Coca-Cola, Macy’s? and were intended to create business for them? Yeah, me either….    When we got to the end of watching that, we very much felt like the nationsof Jer 16:19 “O LORD, my strength and my stronghold,
my refuge in the day of trouble,
to you shall the nations come
from the ends of the earth and say:
“Our fathers have inherited nothing but lies,
worthless things in which there is no profit.”

We knew that our practices regarding Christmas must change.
The following summer, our pastor did a series on the feasts which I missed in person, but got copies of to listen to.  I already wanted to know more about them… He’d invited a local elder of the Messianic congregation to help present Passover – I was thrilled! This was good stuff!  Life caught up with me and flew by and it was early spring before I remembered, and was thankfully able to track down that elder, and attended Passover for the first time with that congregation.  This coming Passover will be my 4th. I learn something new every year… I’ve gone from casual observer, learning and enjoying to dedicated participant still learning and enjoying!  I’ve found home for some of my spiritual questions… many of them really. Not in the Messianic movement, but in the Scriptures… in understanding the culture of the Scriptures. Its a culture I belong to, a culture that is “the People of Yahweh/Yehovah”, the “Bride”… That Spiritual place were my True Husband is Home for my heart.
On the other hand, in choosing this path, in walking the yearly cycle of Yahweh’s Feasts out now for 3 years, and not celebrating Halloween, Christmas, Easter, Valentine’s etc I find myself often feeling like an exile, in a foreign land.  I don’t regret that decision. I’ve come into my Father’s spiritual house and this is the absolutely right place for me to be.  Still, it’s hard. Still, on nights like this, as I go wandering thru Facebook, I feel like a 37 year old exile, so far from Home (the place He said He was going to prepare for me, His bride) not belonging in the foreign culture I find myself in. …

Tomorrow will be better, I know… but for tonight I long for HOME and My True Husband, Yahshua.  And tonight, I see that on this night when most of my friends and neighbors have gone trick or treating, I’ve been longing for Home for a very long time… some 33 years….


October 31, 2012
This past year has been good to me and I’m healing in beautiful ways.
The property in the mountains is now mine again, tho I don’t live there… and recently I had the opportunity to truly dedicate the land to YHVH in ways I’d not known to do before. LIFE has been spoken over my property, and over my mountain. It’s a lovely thing!

However, the point of this blog remains… at this time of year, especially, I feel like a sojourner… in a Land, Far from Home.

I can’t in good conscience mix the traditional practices (of Sunday, Halloween, Christmas, Easter, Valentines – all holidays with their foundations deeply rooted in paganism) into my life and YHVH’s calling to not mix the Holy with the Profane, and to Come out of Babylon.  (For more on that see: Holiday History… as best as I can figure it  &  Holy days, Holidays – a look at Scripture & Equal Opportunity moment )

Yehovah’s calendar means more to me than it did last year. I love the Feasts including the Sabbath, that our Creator designed to be shadow pictures of Good things to come. I love the Substance they point to – the work and life Yeshua our Messiah.

Image of Blackberry cottage, sunlit yard, dark clouds rolling across the mountains

Final goodbyes; Blackberry Cottage, Oct ’14

Nov 1, 2014
This year I’m in an even different place…. Last week, I removed all of the rest of any belongings from the little cottage on “my mountain”.  Very likely, by next October, it will be in the bank’s hands. So, I’ve said my goodbyes…
Today, there is snow on the mountain… I love snow. I love snow in the TN mountains, snow that comes and is beautiful for a few days.. occasionally kept us in for a week, but mostly melts within 2-3 days. Just enough snow to play in, not so much snow that all you see are shades of white and grey for 3 mos.. Perfect! Where I am now, and where I’ve lived much of my life in southern TN, NC & AL it snows rarely, and usually less than 6 inches. Most of the time, it’s sleet or biting rain and 35 degrees. Just drop 3 degrees and snow will you!? I whine at the clouds… So, there’s the weather I miss.
There is also the solitude, the stillness, the wildlife, the sense of being “out”. Sure, it’s very convenient to be 5 minutes from town. But I miss feeling like I’m in the middle of no where.. or as the map says it, “Backwoods, TN” lol yep, that’s it. Backwoods…
Of course, I miss the people too, but telephones and visits make that manageable… and if I moved again, I’d miss the people here…
As time goes on, I’m learning from how my heart responds to healthy love & grace just how much ugly I’ve endured…I still don’t regret my decision to leave the mountain, to take solace in my earthly Father’s home, to not go back up there to live. In fact, after a conversation I had a few weeks ago, I know even more than ever that I am not to live there, in that house again, tho I love the house and the mountain…  But knowing you are doing the right thing doesn’t make the longing or the loss any less…  and so, this week the soundtrack in my head that has been constantly running has been Grant’s song, “Homesick” which he wrote after I posted this blog in 2011.

Oct 27, 2015
How life changes… How we grow… I was right, Blackberry cottage is no longer mine – due to unfulfilled commitments, the bank took ownership in April, and I’m emotionally okay.  It was the first place I truly made “my home” and so I’m proud of it, but I don’t in any way regret having left 4 years ago.  We’ve fully settled in here, tho the boys would love more room, more space.  I have no idea what the future holds, but I feel on the cusp of new, good, moving forward, further healing, and that’s delicious. I’ve realized this fall, that what makes the mountains feel like home is the sweet cold spring water and fresh vibrant air of the Appalachians above 3000 feet elevation.  My youngest son, the other day, compared that sweetness to Heaven Food.  Maybe that’s why the mountains make me long for our True Home in Him 🙂 .  In addition, my heart is tentatively considering the deeper meanings of “home” on earth. The “home is where the heart is” kind of home. The question,  “What it is to know and be known deeply?”   I know the coming year will bring even more changes.  I’m no longer homesick for a geographical location… this year it’s another kind of homesick, another kind of longing ..

Homesick for an actual location on earth  or for “where the heart is” makes me even more poignantly aware that I’m Homesick for Him… to be with Yehovah.  I’m reminded of the end of the Chronicles of Narnia.. As the children moved away from Narnia, going further up and further in, the land before them was, to their surprise Narnia, only bigger, brighter, MORE… and it joined with their homeland of England, only bigger, brighter, MORE…   That’s what the New Earth is all about… Home, just more of it!  And most importantly the ultimate fulfillment of Sukkot which we celebrated just a few weeks ago… Immanuel… God living with US and we with Him – in arms, intimate, loving togetherness.

And so…yet again…  at this time of year… my heart feels, in heavy doses, a longing for our True Home. …

Image of clouds and sky, with caption