I take a somewhat unusual approach to dealing with the subject of the sex education with my children. Yehovah told the Hebrew people that they were to read the entire Torah to the entire assembly – men, women & children, every 7 years. What that means is by the time a child was 7 he would have heard the Torah at least once. Given the rather graphic stories in Torah, and those instructions, I have to assume that Yehovah thought a child at age 7 was old enough to hear about the “birds & the bees” and a whole lot else! My intent is not to teach them “thou shalt nots” as a set of arbitrary rules, but to teach the reason why it’s a good idea to take a bath, eat clean meats, wait for the unity Yehovah has in mind for marriage before having sex. I want them to see the heart of Yehovah full of love for his children.
So, we read the Torah together, following the Torah portion schedule. We also read the NT, and from the rest of the OT, but, it’s usually the Torah portion that gets the most natural and appropriate questions. Today, was Leviticus 15, which deals with cleanliness issues due to discharge – from a running nose, to seminal fluid, to menstruation. It makes sense really – if you are puking, snotting all over the place, have blood oozing out of a sore – you don’t need to be going to the tabernacle to worship and fellowship. Stay at home, take daily baths, get better. Pretty common sense stuff really!
If you’re a man, and you ejaculate, and it’s on your sheets – wash yourself, you sheets and go to fellowship after you’ve bathed. Also, lots of sense being made there! I’ve already talked about Niddah in earlier posts, which you can follow the links to, so won’t reiterate here… Altho, I will say, we had a beautiful conversation about how Yehovah designed women, and what a special time Niddah is, and how they as men can respect and love the women in their lives thru it (in a way that includes proper touch).
Point being – today, this turned to conversation about sex. In fact, my oldest, as we were talking about Niddah, goes, “Oh, so if a husband and wife want to have a baby, then they need to have sex in the time before the Niddah, and a little while after, so there is a good layer of blood to take care of the baby with!” Yep, you got it kiddo! 🙂
But then he had a serious question, which I answered, about what is appropriate to talk about in public, and we discussed puberty (he’s almost 11), and wet dreams, and that none of these emissions we were reading about are “sin” – it’s just a matter of you need to take a shower afterwards, and wash your sheets regularly 🙂 .
Next we got to talking about how premarital sex can be painful – for the heart. We were talking about unity in all things – heart, mind, soul and that Bodily Unity of intercourse is the final step.
He said, “Yeah, it’s like the key that locks it all in place.”
“Sorta” I replied, using interlocking fingers to demonstrate, “Once there is unity in everything else, then yes, it locks everything and seals the union of husband and wife.”
I continued, “And, if you have sex, before the other things are united, think about how that wouldn’t work!” as I linked my two pinky fingers together as the locked key, and then tried to push my otherwise closed fist together.
Light dawning, “Yeah…. Like a machine that’s missing gear pieces… clunk dunk bing bang chunk”
Yep. Like that. I think he’s got it.
As a side note, because my almost 6 year old was needing to understand the terms semen, sperm, etc we also got out the beautiful book “From Conception to Birth” and looked at the pictures. What a fun time, of them laughing about how the embryo looks like an alien to “Oh, He’s so cute!” – a perfectly forming little human, only 1/2 inch long.
“Can you believe it? Something so tiny, with a beating heart, and so cute and forming into a baby. Now you understand why it’s so important to take care of Momma, cause she has precious cargo held in her womb!”
The look on the eldest’s face told me he got that too!